Ashley Massaro is known for being the winner of the World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) 2005 “Diva Search”. She graced the wrestling ring and various magazines and music videos in her 4-year run as a professional wrestler (“eye candy” to male viewers).

ASHLEY MASSARO: THE DIVA I ADORED

In 2005, I was a new wrestling fan. That same year, Ashley Massaro was new in the wrestling scene. I remember her alliance with Trish Stratus, an alliance I found empowering. Ashley and Trish showed spunk and strength that proved how strong women are.

Ashley’s punk-rock persona and fashion sense instantly got me to consider her a “favorite” among the roster. Her style and personality got me to idolize her for at least half of her duration in the WWE.


THE FALL

After Ashley’s knee injury in early 2006, she moved 6 months later to the SmackDown franchise, where she had awful matches and more injuries. Her matches lessened and her performance worsened. Later on she just became an eye candy/“manager” for the then-Tag Team Champions.

Then in early 2007, I truly felt that Ashley Massaro was not the idol I thought her to be. At that time, a hype was built around her because she posed (nude) for men’s magazine Playboy. I didn’t like the idea of her posing nude in a magazine to get ahead of her career. Even worse, her supposed ‘Mania moment came up short when she delivered an awful performance.

At this point, her wrestling career was spiraling down. But to be fair, her modeling was receiving a push.

Months later, a story was printed about Ashley being allegedly involved in an “escort service”. The bad press led to her termination although Massaro claimed she had to attend to her ill daughter. This mention of the daughter also caused me to stop looking at Ashley as a role model. I didn’t know she had a daughter and I wondered if she was ashamed of her own daughter. Looking at her career, I wouldn’t have thought Ashley was a fit parent.


REDEMPTION

Ashley’s absence from the spotlight and after a careful reflection, I realized that I have no right to judge Ashley. Her shortcomings are not a reason for me to stop considering her a role model. She’s not perfect, nobody is. Everybody has ups and downs, even Ashley.

Despite the troubles that go in her life, she tries to rise above them. This got me to reconsider her as a role model. So then I began to focus on the positive things about her; like her ability to get on with life after being constantly being pulled down.

Furthermore, I got to think back on the things that made me dislike her and looked at them from a different light. Posing for Playboy was just proof that Ashley was making the most thrill out of her youth. As for the “escort service” scandal, I was reminded not to believe everything I read.

The bottom line is: Ashley Massaro has her share of mistakes, but there’s more to her. I guess we all are. She’s flawed, like all of us. That’s why Ashley Massaro is my Flawed Role Model.

“Change—we don’t like it, we fear it, but we can’t stop it from coming. We either adapt to change or we get left behind… sometimes change is good. Sometimes change is everything.” (Grey’s Anatomy)

As one grows up, change is inevitable. Friends come and go, you go from high school to college, your knowledge about the world increases. Nothing stays the same for so long. And when things do change, we either adapt to those changes or we get left behind. Trust me, no one should opt for the latter.

So now my eyes are open to the painful obvious: things have drastically changed for Buds Over Studs. We’re not the people we used to be two years ago, when we were carefree and idealistic. We’ve all changed (for the better, and maybe for the worse).

We used to have our dreams and fears—college, boys, getting our dream careers. We used to have carefree days when it didn’t matter if there was a person to loathe or love. We used to have each other’s company. Most of all, we used to have promises.

But like I said, as one grows up, change is inevitable. We all went our ways to chase our individual dreams and our promises of maintaining what we had is now dust in the wind. Furthermore, if I must say, the darkness is revealing itself in its ugliest, most shocking way. In other words, some people change. Or maybe they’re just finally showing their true colors.

I used to have the wishful thinking that things will go back to the way they were in senior year. But, ob-la-di, ob-la-da… life goes on! The wishful thinking is gone. I’m just moving forward; that’s not to say I’m through with Buds Over Studs. I’m just living in reality.

I now have a Twitter: https://twitter.com/pviron

A lot of people ask me why I took up BA English as a course. Some people already don’t ask me because they know the answer to that.

Sometimes I wonder to myself whether or not I made the right choice. There are times when I wonder if maybe I’m better off as a Communications student or a Psychology student because after taking up Psychology 1, I had a strong interest towards the science.

Then again, I remind myself once in a while that I did make the right choice of taking up English. First of all, I have always wanted to be a writer ever since I was a high school senior. And frankly, there’s no place else I’m better at. There’s nothing else out there I’m good at. Writing is all I have. I can’t be an Engineering student or an Accounting student or a Nursing student.

For me, writing is all or nothing. I keep that thought in mind so much to the point that sometimes I force myself too much to try to write something and sometimes end up in self-disappointment when I end up quitting what I’m writing.

I need to know that I’m good enough.

And that is why I’m taking BA English and I am damn determined to survive, semester after semester.

I’ll be the writer I want myself to be. Even as a “side-job”, I want to become an English/Literature teacher because Erin Gruwell and Haley James Scott served as strong influences.

Besides, John Cena said it best: “I never back down, I never quit.”